My Covert Mission to Undermine Unethical Facebook Ads and Save the World From Communism

Here's the objection I have to ads on Facebook like the ones you see here: They're unethical.

Because they're unethical, it is my opinion that Facebook should not allow them. Someone at Facebook screens all ads before giving the go-ahead to allow them to be posted, but they don't seem to consider these ads impermissible. I do, and so should you.

Why are they unethical? Because the advertiser has not licensed — that is, paid for the right to use — Julia Roberts's image. Or Jennifer Aniston's. Or Sandra Bullock's. Or Kelly Ripa's. You might be thinking, oh, who cares, they're big celebrities, they have lots of money, so it's OK for a small business to steal their image and use it for their own purposes.

You are wrong. Here's why.

To any professional who knows anything about business, marketing, or advertising, these ads positively scream amateur! Because professionals know that you can't just appropriate the image of Mickey Mouse or Homer Simpson for use in your promotional materials. You have to negotiate, and pay for it. Jennifer Aniston's people may not be patrolling the Internet for the unauthorized use of her image, but I dare you to try using a Disney character without permission. (Go ahead, try it. You'll be shocked at how quickly the Disney people will come down on you.)

The advertisers that post these unethical, amateur-style Facebook ads are using a technique called manufactured credibility, which is something professional marketers do when they don't have any real credibility. If you can't get a doctor to be an official spokesperson for your vitamin supplement, hire an actor and dress him in a white coat. Manufacture credibility. There's nothing unethical about this technique, so long as the actor doesn't actually say, "I am a doctor." You can't outright lie in advertising, but you can mislead like hell.

The snake-oil salesmen behind these Facebook ads are attempting to mislead you into believing that these celebrities use their products. If you believe that, even a little bit, then you are a moron.

Finally, consider this: Philosophically speaking, the idea that any artist's images, or words, or art, should be free for all to use for any commercial purpose is, essentially, communistic. This is America. Is that really how you want to roll?

So, what is my covert mission? Every time I see one of these ads on my Facebook page, I click on it ten times. The advertiser pays per click, which means every time I click on it, it's costing them money, and they're getting nothing for it because I'm not following through to purchase their miracle diet products or wrinkle cream.

I encourage you to join me in my mission.